The full advice, before you start writing for theatre:
- Sadly directors are not there to get your ‘vision’ on stage in an unadulterated form – many have thoughts of their own. Live with it.
- Actors are not wet-props. Some have thoughts and feelings like regular people do.
- You will rarely get the credit, but some directors will always try to give you the blame (even if they rewrite your script).
- Putting on a play is very much a group activity, but you’re not really in the group (most of the time).
- Part of your job is to present your work in a properly formatted fashion with clear and precise stage directions. Your genius is more recognisable that way.
- Do not expect to live on what you earn as a theatre writer, get yourself a proper job too.
- It’s all right to say ‘I’ve got a new play on’, just not in the presence of anybody else involved in the production.
- Writers are not meant to marry actors. It’s a matter/antimatter thing.
- If you want to work with professionals, act like a professional – sorry, be a professional; never act at all. That’s not your job.
- Theatre writers are not restricted to just writing plot and dialogue. If you really, really believe it is truly important that somebody should enter STAGE LEFT say so, but don’t be an arse about it.
- You are not writing a radio play – think visually.
- You are not writing a film script either – don’t think that visually.
- If you require lavish sets marry well.
- Never tell anybody with a manual occupation, or working in public services, how hard your job is.
- Awards don’t matter until you get one.
- Never trust anybody who says you can make money at the Edinburgh Fringe, unless they sell fast food.
- Most critics are only human.
- The show does not have to go on, get a sense of perspective – other people have lives too.
- Producer is a job too.
- Never be the last one to stop clapping at your own show. Continue reading For anybody considering writing for theatre: Things Theatre Writers Should Know
Nicely Strongoak 