Winter festivals can be found in many places, including the World of the Wickets it seems: Read ‘The Great Winter Wicket‘ now, while it’s the right time of year.

Winter festivals can be found in many places, including the World of the Wickets it seems: Read ‘The Great Winter Wicket‘ now, while it’s the right time of year.

A short introduction to the ‘Reveries of Yore’ called ‘The Well of Unhappiness‘. It may be short but it is strange!

I wrote recently about a new audio series I am contributing to on YouTube and now look: there’s another one available!

This one is called ‘The Jester’ and we visit a court of one the great empires where Jesters are not just funny guys and gals. They are also …
What’s more, there are more to come, including different perspectives on this fascinating world we are building along with head honcho Aaron. What Larts, eh Pip?
Absolutely delighted to share something new I have been contributing to called Reveries of Yore: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-fzOYr5md8 . It’s a fantasy series set in a fascinating world that is defined by mysterious wicketgates and the lore and adventures will grow as different authors contribute. With various story lengths it’s perfect for late night listening or journeys both short and long. I hope you all enjoy it!

I have been made aware that it might be a good idea to mention that this isn’t for children — not that it’s particularly rude or anything, just not children’s fantasy. It is rather lovely though, so pleased to hear it read aloud.
Congratulations to Aaron whose baby this is and thanks to Laura Greaves for the marvellous narration.
For those of you wanting to catch the ‘Messiah’ short film ‘what I wrote’ (it’s set in Ireland you know, about the premier of Handel’s Messiah) it is available virtually until May 4th at Venezia Shorts Festival. EMAIL LOGIN VENEZIASHORTSVE PASSWORD VSVIRTUALEVENT It’s in PROGRAMME 11. It’s about 15-20 minutes long. I hope you enjoy it!


I love myths. I have for as long as I can remember. Myths are traditional stories, especially ones that are concerning with the early history of specific groups of people and give insights into natural or social phenomenon. This can often involve supernatural beings or events, which is pretty much fantasy too. Myths from different locations share a lot of things in common, across the miles and the years – as does crime, but we’ll get to that.
The tales about King Arthur and his Round Table are based in myth and legend too – the difference between that legends potentially have an historical basis. If any story has been more continuously reinvented, from the days of Thomas Mallory’s Le Morte d’Arthur to teen-appeal TV, I don’t know of it. Mark Twain even put ‘A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court’
So, I wondered, some time ago now, whether Camelot was ripe for yet another reinvention? A reinvention that involved a little more crime, that in essence was a touch more Noir? ‘Camelot Noir’ – it certainly has a ring to it!
I realised straight off that this was not the sort of book to appeal to genre purists of course, let alone those who think that intertextuality should be banned and books, movies, plays, songs and games must all stay in their separate boxes. I don’t. I worship at the altar of intertextuality, nothing excites me more – witness my not getting to sleep when I discovered something exciting about the fabulous ‘Pennyworth’ TV series last night (but that’s another blog!). And these classifications are breaking down all over the place and, as a film scriptwriter as well, I love playing with genres: crime and fantasy, myths and murder – well it went on all the time, didn’t it?
There is one major question to be answered though; are the basics necessary for crime fiction present in such a myth? It’s a very important question as well. Fortunately I had some help in answering it. Crime writer, and former police officer, Clare Mackintosh has put together a 10-point checklist that or us to cover the subject matter.
Here are what Clare suggests are the essentials of crime fiction and what I believe ‘Camelot Noir’ offers.
A hook
Well, how about being in Camelot without a single shiny knight in sight? Just those ‘mean cobbled streets’ that detectives have always strode down in one guise or another.
Atmosphere.
Camelot would certainly be dark and mysterious enough for a good Noir feel. Camelot could have invented it.
A crime.
The place is lousy with swords, surely a serious crime is almost inevitable. Yes, but the crime has to matter – it can’t be just casual mayhem. That wouldn’t do at all, although such violence can’t be ruled out either.
A victim.
The victim therefore needs to matter – as Lords and Ladies always have done.
A villain.
Oh, myths have plenty of great villains. Camelot is no exception, take your pick.
Red herrings.
When there is a fantasy element the herrings aren’t just red they can fly too. No cheating though, a common problem for ‘detectives’ in science fiction crime novels as well.
Twists and reveals.
How about throwing in an ageless magician with his own agenda? That should do it.
Tension.
The fate of an entire Kingdom and the monarchy should create enough of that.
A satisfying Resolution
With room for a sequel? No problem.
A hero
There are plenty of heroes in Camelot. Rather too many perhaps and they all wear a lot of polished metal and sit round a big Round Table. They’re great in their place but not the right sort of hero we need at all. No, what Camelot needs, to quote Raymond Chandler is a man “who is neither tarnished nor afraid. He is the hero; he is everything. He must be a complete man and a common man and yet an unusual man… He must be the best man in his world and a good enough man for any world. He will take no man’s money dishonestly and no man’s insolence without a due and dispassionate revenge.’ Perhaps he could be called Chaucere? (The extra ‘e’ being a nod Chandler’s Marlowe – see what I did?)
That’s the 10 essential ingredients for crime fiction all ticked then and so I hereby conclude that this Arthurian myth, at least, fulfils the bill.
All that remains is for me to introduce you to our hero Chaucere. A man with a great sense of fair play for all people, not just those in the Big House on the Hill. A sword that was ‘for hire’ for many years in many different places, before our man’s feet led him back to the place of his birth and a secret he dare not reveal, less a Kingdom falls before it rises. He lives in the less elegant environs of a Camelot you won’t have seen before. This, after all, is ‘Camelot Noir’.
It’s just a crime novel really, with magicians, a well-known King and a famous sword. It’s published by Monkey Business, an imprint of Grey House in the Woods.
Reference
10 essential ingredients for crime fiction by Clare Mackintosh
One of the great joys of my life was having the opportunity to hear a talk by the genius comedy animator and director Chuck Jones. It was in Cambridge (UK) in the 1990s when Chuck was doing a book promotion for his marvelous ‘Chuck Amuck’ autobiography.

I can safely say that I have never felt the same before or after. This was not entirely due to the awe I felt at being in the presence of somebody whose work I had adored since I first crawled eagerly to the TV set. (Family legend had it that my first word was PAL – and you have to be very old to get that!) It was also down to the fact that my mucker and fellow animation fan, Mr. Max, took that evening to introduce me to the Brain Neutralizer Cocktail*. We had two. It does what it says on the tin.
Perhaps neither of us got everything from the talk we might have. I forgot to get my copy of his book signed for a start. However, I can say that it was the first time that I had every felt like somebody from one of his cartoons: probably Wile E. Coyote after the anvil has hit his head from a great height. It was all very wonderful.
As I have mentioned, I usually only collection production cels but when I saw this signed Wile E. Coyote** sericel, with matching Roadrunner, I just had to get them. They give me a great deal of pleasure, as you can image.

Thank you for everything, Mr. Jones.
*Brain Neutralizer Cocktail
We were never given the definitive recipe, but it was probably a variation on the Brain Duster. Approach with care:
1 oz. rye whiskey
1 oz. absinthe
1 oz. Italian vermouth
1 dash Angostura bitters
Stir ingredients with cracked ice. Strain into chilled glass. Go and see a hero and nearly miss it all.
** I know it is just a stamp – but heck!